This Is My Story!

sometimes life doesn't fair right? and something you just wanna hide from nothing. alright, it was the first december and its still feel the same. i don't want to continue this painful life. i have no parent anymore. my mom already died years ago and not long after that my father leave me with my little sister, i dont know why. Since that i have to work hard to survive. Actually i don't want to continue this life, but i have to find the money to pay the hospital. my little sister is very pity. she has a cancer. she cant move from her bed, she only can move her arms. I dont know why she has a spirit for life and i don't. i feel very useless because i think i cant make my little sister happy. everyday after working, i just can bring her some comics. Just comics but she always said " thank you so much! i love you !" Christmas came closer, i have to save my money right now. and i make promised to my little sister to bring her out to the center of the town. i wa...

maybe i wasn't asking you to love me back. but i was asking you to understand. Because for so long I've been hurt and for so long you've been ignored it and maybe its bad timing, but maybe i don't care. I've been here all along just waiting, waiting for you to notice, waiting for you to care. waiting for you to say you've been waiting too, and you haven't and maybe you never will or maybe you afraid to. Actually i always happy when you smile even that smile isn't for me. but it all hurts the same and in the end I'm the one that's left broken and then i lay down to sleep, I'm still the one crying like i probably always will.

Whoever,     Forgive my foolishness, but i think of you as my wonderful heavenly angel, and i want to talk to you as a child would talk to his brother. i can't understand why nature made it so complicated, when it so simple. i don't have courage. still hardly dare to talk to you and I don't even dare to stare at  you when our eyes met. I'm frustrated because i cant tell you what i feels for you. I'm mad because i dont know how you feel but i want to know! of course I'm sad because i thinking of you every day and night. absolutely angry, because you don't understand maybe. aggravated because you dont belong to me. and i wanted you to be mine. totally disappointed because we can't be together.     My lovely friends always telling me to smile to him but i can't. well i've tried that. i've tried to hide my nervous and covering that with innocent face. no matter how many marks i wore. that's all not going better.     should i ask, "ma...

" Moving on is easy. but forget it? well that's another story" Since last year , I was never attracted to any boy again . I think , that every guy is same . always sucks . Because of him that give me so much memories in my life and that's hurt me ten times more! that's so unfair. so since that i tried not to interested in any boy. I just focus to every lesson at school. My friends are always bothering me by stupid rumor that i cant moving on -_- . Silly. But... Oneday, someone passed on my class with his basketball clothes. his eyes were deep like the sky at night, so innocent. he was tall and handsome boy. My heartbeat increased. I was too mesmerized by him. i don't know why, that i still stared at him like an idiot until he turned away. this is idiot. it seems I was too frozen to move u ntil someone shouted my name with upset. I decided to went out quickly before anyone notice me. I went to the basketball court w...

In love with EnidBlyton. fourth book of Adventure ( Lucy-Ann, Dinah, Philip, Jack and of course Kiki )    After Lucy-Ann, Dinah, Philip and Jack exposed to measles. Their mother Allowed them to go on vocation. Fortunately, uncle Bill had to go to the quiet place to hide from the enemy who wanted to kill him. So uncle Bill invited kids to went to go together to the bird island. They are really happy, they didn't know that they would be involved in the new adventure.    There are many uninhabited islands, only animals. They're choice one of them and found many Puffin.    One day, there were a mysterious plane passing the island . Bill become worried that someone found him there. So he went to check another island around there. apparently there were an enemy who saw bill when he come back to the puffin island.     One night, when Bill sent a message through a radio, someone hit his head and took him to the...

This morning i started the first breath of awakening with a prayer of praise. then i opened my pc. I'm confused what should i do. there was a screensaver of my memories when my best friend and i spent our time together. suddenly it feels like there was a   punch hit my chest. letting go of someone we love is the hardest part to do. i tried to forget her, but it just make me thought about her more and more.  the worst part today is when i cried so hard. i cant stopped my tears down to my cheek. i'm so fucking embarrassed. oh god give me some strength for through this fucking embarrassing moment! dont let my tears down like a waterfall! she's too important to me and i dont wanna lose her. ahg.. holycrap!

hey dude .. how are you ? do you know how much i miss you ? please darling .. dont make me confused . i thought we're best friend . easy for you to leave me .. you dont know anything about my feeling for you ! i dont understand why you changes a lot .. am i wrong ? just tell me ! DONT BE STUPID ! no wind or rain but storm ! when your eyes met my gaze , you just walked away . when i said hi , you just stared at me just like an idiot ! what happened with your brain ? ERROR huh ? give me just one good reason ! please tell me that you're not an idiot who lost her mind ! if i made you upset .. I'm sorry i didnt mean for that ! lets spend our time together again . remember when we laughed at every moment together . i love you . - Ve ra

Dear you, remember? you and your friend passed by my class and your fuckin' friends tell a hell jokes about you and me. one of them even threw your shoes into my class. i cought your shoe. it was a big shoe!. then you seek your socks inside the trashcan. i pretended that i wrote on a paper. i can assure you that it was one of my silly tricks to avoid you. and i always got crazy when i saw you. sometime i laughed. maybe because your face is funny haha. -vera

i dont know what really happen to me! I never really thought I would ever get to this point of my life, Im confused. I remember those days when the beauty of a wonderful friendship made me realize I did not wanted a friendship from you anymore. I thought those moments were too great, those laughs were too loud, those smiles were too big, but turns out I was just too young to know that’s the way real friendships are sometimes. As the friendship grew stronger, my feelings for you started to grow even more, to the point where I could’ve sworn I was in love with you. It was weird though, cause I was pretty sure you wanted more from me too. Well, the thing is shit happens and I finally understood we were just friends and that was all we were going to be, I started realizing being your best friend meant staying by your side forever and being your girlfriend didn’t, so I was fine. Years passed by, I moved on and learned to “love” another guy, you had a girlfriend too. But you were still my...

I was thinking today, that we’re all gonna die one day and I was thinking of all the things that I take for granted and sometimes I forget how blessed I am. And I just wanted to say that if you’re ever feeling down, truly take a moment out of your day to think of everything that you cherish. Go squeeze someone you love - put your heart and soul into that hug and don’t let go until you both can’t breathe. Go make a friend with someone completely random. Hold the door open for someone and if they don’t even acknowledge you, just smile. Never stop smiling. And if you’re ever feeling lost, take a chance if you’ve got nowhere to go any road will get you there. Dance and singlike no one’s watching, and if you like someone, tell them. Laugh at the stupid jokes only you and your best friend find funny laugh until your stomach hurts. And if you’ve ever been mean to anyone and never got the chance to say sorry, apologize. Life’s too short to waste your time being a jerk....

When it seems like there’s no one left to run to in this empty world you can come to me I’ll be your shooting star. You can tell me your dreams I can’t promise to make them come true, but I’ll be there to pick up the pieces of your broken heart if your dreams happen to fall through. I want someone to share my secrets with, someone to talk to late at night when I can’t sleep, someone who feels comfortable around my family, someone to comfort me when I’m scared, to hold me when I’m sad, someone who doesn’t need to say that he loves me for me to know its true. Have you ever heard a song from so long ago with so many memories tied to it that it made you cry? And didn’t you with that you could go back into time when everything seemed so much simpler and carefree? Those are songs that are the soundtrack of our lives… the ones that bring back childhood memories, best friends, first love, first heartbreak… the memories. Why did I break up with him? Well ,it’s like, once I sat down and look...